As I'm sure you can imagine, it is difficult adapting to my new environment in the Army, when coming from a place where "Nature is my Religion, the Earth is my Church". I had to surrender my privacy, my physical practice of meditation and channeling (I'm going to try and work with religious services here to see if them can make an accomodation for me), leave my tarot deck behind, my palmistry supplies, and had to liquidate my apotheca i.e. apothecary, which was by far the hardest sacrifice I've had to make thus far.
I have felt so disconnected from my inner stillness, magick, and spiritual power, that I have never felt more like a "muggle" for lack of a better phrase. I have never felt so pedestrian, so susceptible to my external environment. The magickal-armor I had, feels as though it's been stripped away. I knew this was going to happen when I decided to enlist. But I also knew however challenging, would bring the greatest medicine gained; figuring how to thrive in my practice, when I possess none of my usual tools.
As my military career is still very young and am awarded few privileges, my circumstances will exponentially get better once I arrive at my first duty station. But for now, I can tell you that finding my brightest, highest, most luminous-self within, has been a challenge here. Here a the few ways I've held my spiritual practice without using familiar external tools:
I acknowledge the wind when it arrives. I allow it to sift throughout my entire being. And I ask the wind, what gifts and medicine it offers me. Sometimes the wind offers the reminder of peace and tranquility found within a single deep breath...sometimes it's gifts are a reminder to cleanse and clear myself of detrimental disincarnate-spirits, entities, beings, thoughtforms, and/or devices....and other times, the wind quietly reminds me of how loud and powerful my own magick is in this world.
When presented with an animal totem I know carries medicine for me, I pay close attention to that totem's behavior, it's characteristics and significance and harvest the totem's offering by applying those acknowledgements to my present circumstances. Animal totems is one of my favorite methods of connecting with spirit and Source that I am so grateful the wild life is ever present here!
On occasion, I will come across a rock that speaks to me, declaring that one, they are meant to journey with me and I should collect them, and two, I am meant to retain the lessons of whatever significant event/quandary/achievement that rock is associated with.
I was gifted a peach hunk of quartz during my early days of Basic Training, it's significance was to acknowledge the process I was undergoing of being molded and reshaped over and over again, kneading me into a well-formed soldier. Another when I completed my final graduation requirement of "The Forge", appeared to me as a coral and black quartz, flat stone, in the shape of an arrow head! And my most recent one, a yellow agate in the shape of a triangle, denoting the three phases of my transformation process: Basic Training, AIT, and next is my first Duty station. Of course the trifecta-pebble also guides towards the trinity of many things:
Sun, Moon, and Sky
Maiden, Mother, Crone
Morning, Noon, and Night
Life, Death, and Rebirth....to name a few
With so many things in my surroundings that have to be in regulation, we are allowed to purchase our own bedding. So I bought a version of the same bedsheets I had at home, that are covered in a botanical pattern. Just seeing the images of plants, whose medicine holds such dear relationship with me, makes me feel more like myself. It may sound silly, but I do adore snuggling up in my herby sheets!
Having the opportunity to work on my website here, write blog posts to you all, and stay connected to community now that my internet privileges are restored has definitely helped.
I also acknowledge that BIG MEDICINE I am meant to unlock while serving my country, is to learn how to thrive in an environment where I have little CONTROL. I am a very controlling person; I like things a certain way, I'm very organized, efficient, and meticulous. I like to maximize opportunities, and one of the things I like to maximize is WHERE I LIVE.
I no longer have a say in where I live. So once again, I am being challenged to surrender to the flow of my life. This lack of having control will allow me to practice surrendering and trusting Source, to trust in the direction and doors the Universe and my Guides are offering me. I will walk confidently in my journey knowing that magick awaits me everywhere I go.
Basically, I acknowledge opportunities presented to me, and squander nothing.
I invite you to pause in your own life and ask yourself what you are being invited into in your life's present challenges? What might those challenges be affording you the opportunity to do or understand or grow from? What positive lesson, person, or event might be entering your life as a result of the challenge you are facing?
How could you connect with YOUR practice, if all external objects were removed? What might the core of your practice look like? What ways could you continue your practice in a pinch?
Comments